Friday Funny

Poor Granny...but this is too funny not to post...only in the South

Poor DMV officials. They have a hard time of it, between re-taking digital I.D. photos until little newly-licensed Kayla or Callie gets her bangs just right and, well, they have to spend all day in the DMV.

We can't blame them for being a little behind on the Web-SMS shorthand lingo, but this? Really? A cute 60-year-old Grandma from Fayetteville, NC happily drove to and from her teaching job with the kickin' set of WTF license plates that had been issued to her by the DMV. Last July, she figured out what the somehow not -- thanks to some help from her teenage grandchildren. When the kids informed her of the true implications of the letters on her license plate, the woman was so vexed that she complained to DMV officials.

Gran's plates were replaced gratis, and the North Carolina DMV has offered to exchange any WTF or other questionable plates free of charge. Embarrassingly, it took DMV officials almost a year to realize that the sample plate on their site is also, ironically, of the WTF variety. Apparently some NC Webmaster has an, er, awesome sense of humor. They are currently trying to take the picture down. [Source: WXII12]

Maroon 5

Yum...reminder that I took these with my iPhone and didn't bring my camera...stupid girl. But I will be getting pictures from my co-workers!

Chi Town

I spent the last few days in Chicago and I loved it. I was in Evanston, IL a few years ago visiting my dear friend, Josh while he was at Northwestern. We didn't spend any time in Chicago since we were too busy packing him up to drive halfway cross the country. But this time we saw where the Cubbies play, the great skyline, the fountain that is in the beginning credits of Married...with Children (dammit now I have that song in my head...Love and marriage, love and marriage, its an institute you can't disparage...). We had traditional Chicago pizza, if you haven't had it Chicago pizza is about 2-inches thick and sooo filling! It starts with dough, sauce, cheese, more dough and more sauce on top!

We went to a crazy German bar right down the street from Wrigley and somehow I never knew that the Cubs have their own song! Everyone in the bar knew all the words and they sing it as loudly as they can whenever the Cubs win a game. And they won all weekend - against the White Sox too just to add injury to insult.

Monday night we all went to a concert in Lincoln Park Zoo and saw Maroon 5. We pushed our way up to the front row and FREAKED out every time Adam Levine got near us. I am positive he was looking at me the whole time (not really but I can dream, can't I?)

Biking...it hurts!

I haven't been on a bike in years and when I say years I mean over 10 years. Yes, I have a cruiser at the beach house that I've been on once and that was a bit wobbly but it was for about 1/2 mile. Sunday we (meaning Jason) decided to go on the trail by the Parkway for what turned into a 10-mile bike ride. This was some intense riding too - it wasn't just flat and straight it was hilly and twisty and for a second a little dangerous.
I was riding along - a bit slow too might I add considering this was like I said my first bike ride in many years, getting used to being on a bike and even remembering what the gears meant and how they worked was a challenge.
Off we went and things were going ok acutally. We entered a part of the trail that was a bit woodsy and very steep. I was slowly going down a hill on my side of the trail (yes there are lines to separate left and right sides) and I saw out of the top of my vision 1 bike coming towards me in the opposite direction. So I stayed on my course then all of a sudden another bike came along also in my lane. Noticing that the biker wasn't stopping coming RIGHT at me I let out a soft scream and tried to get out of the way. Stupid girl went right into me then was stopped by a tree, she fell off her bike and tumbled not once but 2 times head over heels and promptly got up, brushed herself off and asked me if I was ok.
I couldn't believe it - was I ok? I was fine - she was the one doing somersaults down a hill off a bike. She quickly got back on her bike and they rode away, slightly embarassed I'm sure.
After that the only mentionable events were that I couldn't force myself to finish the trail to end up at George Washington's house - what did he ever do for me anyways? :)
So I convinced Jason to turn around and away we went finishing our 10-mile ride. The next day my legs didn't hurt just my ass from sitting on a boy's seat on a girls bike. Boys seats are too narrow and my ass is too wide for any level of comfort. So hopefully next time I will get a better seat and the trip won't be so painful.
I'm thinking after my 5-day trip to Chicago and all the food I'm going to be eating I'm going to need another 10 miles. Whew.

Love and Labels

Last week I went to see Sex and the City - the movie and was thoroughly entertained. It did lean a bit on the long side but it elicited an emotional reaction from me and that is the sign of a good movie.
I was a bit grossed out - not by Charlotte's "poo in the pants" experience but by Miranda's bikini line. I don't know if this is common for all women but good god I hope not - I have NEVER experienced something like that and it was disgusting!
But the clothes were good (I think only 1 or 2 of Carrie's outfits I grimaced at) the shoes were great and I admired both enviously. I was a bit confused by Carrie's cellphone and the fact that it was covered in duct tape. I tried googling it and only came up with people such as myself commenting on it. I guess it's to point out that Carrie isn't very tech savvy and had the same cell that she had from the show.
It was sad at the end to know that this was probably the last time I will see a new plot line from the SAC dynasty and will have to settle for syndication.

In the spirit of the Olympics and wine

SLOW AND STEADY WITH A BREAK FOR WINE

While planning the first modern games in Athens in 1896, French historian Michel Breal wanted an event that linked the competition back to its ancient roots. He suggested a footrace that was the distance from Athens to Marathon. Not surprisingly, the Greek people were captivated by the notion of a race with such strong ties to their country's history, and they become obsessed with dominating the event.While other nations barely prepared for the competition, the marathon-crazed nation held two qualifying trials to choose its entrants. Except for the Greek runners, only one other contestant had run a full marathon before the Olympic Games. On the day of the race, the lack of proper training quickly took its toll, and by the halfway point, runners started dropping like flies. After nearly three hours, fans at the finish line learned that a Greek, Spiridon Louis, had taken the lead after a slow start and a break for a glass of wine. Greece's Prince George and Crown Prince Constantine got so excited that they joined Louis for his last surge to the finish line. Louis, a peasant farmer, quickly became a national hero, and his name even entered the Greek vernacular. The term egine Louis, which translates as "become Louis," is still used to mean "run quickly."

Polar Bears

Progress on Polar Bears from http://www.wecansolveit.org/

The US Department of the Interior today (few days ago) granted Endangered Species Act protection to the polar bear in light of shrinking Arctic ice due to climate change. The Alliance for Climate Protection's We Campaign recently submitted a petition signed by 136,000 Americans to Interior Secretary Dirk Kempthorne urging him to list the polar bear.
In response to the decision, Cathy Zoi, CEO of the Alliance for Climate Protection, issued the following statement:
"Today's decision by Secretary Kempthorne is a step in the right direction. The scientific community believes the polar bear needs protection, and so do the American people, who have been calling for this action in large numbers. While this step is encouraging, solving the climate crisis will require bold leadership that truly acknowledges the urgency of the problem."

I was one of the people who signed this petition and amazingly there STILL are people who say global warming is a "myth". To all those people I say - go hug a Polar Bear or steal their baby.

You're a tool if you get these tools

My brother-in-law is a floor layer (2 words, 1 word??) and he was working at Hermes the other day. All of us were very upset for him not bringing us anything - I would love a fetching scarf or something similar to accent my new shoes but sigh...

So as Sissy and I were checking the website for the validity of said $550 beach towels and lo and behold dumb-ass people actually do spend their money on shit like that. So I was searching and found a section labeled "Surprise!" And what a surprise it was! This lovely gardening set is $330 - so you can dig in the dirt with $330 HOE. Nice right?

Celebrate the Unity of Your Eyebrows

http://monobrow.com/

Finally uni-browers of the World a site JUST FOR YOU to celebrate your unity!

Thanks, Sissy for yet another blog worthy site!

Stupidest Email of the Day

I am always surprised how much time people put into stupid emails and fake forwards - things along those lines but sometimes an email strikes you with such hatred its almost impossible to process. Are you really kidding me with this crap? You learn this shit in Kindergarten - bathe regularly, go to the bathroom a lot, dress right for the weather??!! Is this for people living in complete oblivion but yet still have an email account? If so this is for you...

WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR HEALTH!


1.) Brush twice a day!
2.) Dress right for the weather.
3.) Visit the dentist regularly.
4.) Get plenty of rest.
5.) Make sure your hair is dry before going outside.
6.) Eat right.
7.) Get outside in the sun every once in a while.
8.) Always wear a seatbelt.
9.) Control your drinking of alcoholic beverages.
10.) Smile! It will make you feel better.
11.) Don't over indulge yourself.
12.) Bathe regularly.
13.) Read to exercise the brain.
14.) Surround yourself with friends.
15.) Stay away from too much caffeine.
16.) Use the bathroom regularly.
17.) Get plenty of exercise.
18.) Have your eyes checked regularly.
19.) Eat plenty of vegetables.
20.) Believe that people will like you for who you are.
21.) Forgive and forget.
22.) Take plenty of vacations.
23.) Celebrate all special occasions.
24.) Pick up a hobby.
25.) Love your neighbor as yourself.

Do all these things and you will be a happier, healthier person!