Casual Dress : the NEW definition

No one was more excited than I when I heard that my company was going to Casual-mode for the remainder of winter (hopefully) - this meant I could wear jeans whenever I wanted to. Now mind you - this being a "professional" place to work I didn't expect what I have seen - how dumb was I?

Here is a list of what I do NOT consider appropriate for Casual Wear (or any other wear actually - it is offensive however you spin it)

• Track suits - believe it or not you will NOT look as cool as a Beastie Boy whilst wearing one
• Velour suits - once again this look went out with J-Lo's street cred
• Being bra-less - hmmmm need I explain this one? The Potato in my department decided to do this today and ick I tried not to look but ick!
• Too tight t-shirts - if I can see your love handles from across the office I can only imagine what you look like up close
• Anything you would consider "Club Wear" - you bought it to go out and look like a hussy so why would you wear it to work?
• Oh also, not everyone can wear jeans - they do show off a lot more of your figure than pants and ick again on the too tight rule - damn there are some "Shelf Asses" around here!
• Sweatwear - sweatshirt, sweatpants, sweatsuit, anything made of sweat material should be reserved for the gym
• And the ever faithful baseball cap - oh how I love the company logo hat - you are inside and my mom always told me it was rude to wear a hat indoors